it’s just a season.

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Can I be honest with you?

Being a mom is so hard. It’s amazing, and beautiful and so sweet. But it’s not easy. And I wasn’t expecting it to be easy, by any means. But I don’t know if I was prepared for the weight of it.

Most days, I feel like I’m running 90 miles an hour, rushing from one thing to the next, with little time to even breathe. I’m constantly counting bottles, switching over the laundry, ticking through a mile long to do list, checking my calendar. My mind is always on, always processing, always anticipating what’s next.

And it’s exhausting.

I fall into bed most nights feeling like I’ve done nothing and everything, simultaneously. I fall into bed feeling inadequate and overwhelmed. I fall into bed feeling like maybe I’m not cut out for this, like maybe God got it wrong when He picked me for all of these beautiful, hard things.

And then I remember, this is just a season.

I don’t know who told me this or where I read it, but when Emmett was just days old, I repeated this to myself so often. This is just a season. He will only be this little for such a short time. He won’t always cry because he needs you. He won’t always want to cuddle you this much. You will only be home with him for such a short time. You will never get these memories back if you waste them. You won’t get this time with your spouse back: when it’s almost midnight, the candle is almost burnt out, and you’re both exhausted but you haven’t spent more than five minutes just being with each other.

It’s just a season. It’s hard and stressful, and takes so much work, but it’s just a season.

I think this can be true for everyone and every stage of life. New baby, new marriage, new job; season of loss, grief, joy, passion, these all come in waves. Some seasons are so sweet and fulfilling and inspiring, you feel like you are living your best life constantly; and some seasons can make you feel like you may never be joyful again. It’s just a season. Both are fleeting, and while they may not feel like it, they can be over in an instant.

You have the option to thrive, in every season. Listen to me when I say that: you can do this season well, if you want. You can survive this and you will. Coming from a mama who is so, so tired, I don’t always choose to thrive where I am; some days I choose to switch off and just survive. I feel bad for myself, I perform rather than rest, I distract myself. But on the days that I choose thriving over surviving, when I choose to be present where I am, no matter how hard or sweet the season is, I find myself a better wife, mom and friend.

Dig deep. When you’re in a hard season, cry, call a friend, pray, and give yourself (and others) lots of grace. When you’re in a season of sweetness, say thank you often, kiss your spouse, cuddle your baby, and breathe. In both seasons, get out of the house, read a book, pray intentionally, and gather around your people.

And remember, it’s just a season.

xx

Steffanie

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